My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
