so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize
