margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Do vagina's smell?
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Randomize