Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
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