She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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