Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
