at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
