Pappa wants mamma naked
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
