He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize