Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I'm just crazy horny about you
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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