Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
