We named our party play list daddy issues
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
