Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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