Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize
