Im at strip club and am horny
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Randomize
