we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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