Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Randomize
