In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I just had sex on a roof
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
