id be glad to
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
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