she was so not down for the gang bang
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Randomize
