so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
