let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize