now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
