We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
She told me I should be a condom model.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
