have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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