Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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