that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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