the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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