his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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