My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize