How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize