Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
