Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize