Soap is not a condiment
and you said cock pushups were impossible
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Randomize
