I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
