do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Randomize