therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
