Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
