Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Randomize
