My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
