Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
