On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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