You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Randomize
