we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize