I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
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