She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules