Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (912): View more from Georgia

  He kissed a someone with a penis

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (912): He kissed a someone with a penis http://tfl.nu/3ilh
  Replies (14) Good night (1014) Bad night (3172) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): 3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4. http://tfl.nu/2tep
  Replies (16) Good night (7326) Bad night (551) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity. http://tfl.nu/zm0j
  Replies (19) Good night (4600) Bad night (1460)
• Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (647): there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper. http://tfl.nu/yyzx
  Replies (14) Good night (6101) Bad night (856) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  he said i ruined lesbian porn for him

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): he said i ruined lesbian porn for him http://tfl.nu/xboc
  Replies (12) Good night (857) Bad night (3759) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome. http://tfl.nu/7fz1
  Replies (9) Good night (5937) Bad night (751)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright. http://tfl.nu/kb3m
  Replies (11) Good night (2289) Bad night (560)
• Favorite

  (319): View more from Iowa

  Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (319): Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best? http://tfl.nu/g5yt
  Replies (15) Good night (3388) Bad night (560) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.

  (1-973): View more from New Jersey

  Not worth it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene. (1-973): Not worth it. http://tfl.nu/l4pk
  Replies (4) Good night (736) Bad night (1214) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (707): I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once http://tfl.nu/s42e
  Replies (5) Good night (785) Bad night (879) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST http://tfl.nu/uts3
  Replies (5) Good night (1564) Bad night (462) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open. http://tfl.nu/8umi
  Replies (7) Good night (1379) Bad night (429) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush. http://tfl.nu/eadi
  Replies (2) Good night (829) Bad night (670) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (607): I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street... http://tfl.nu/0y14
  Replies (11) Good night (1239) Bad night (287) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it. http://tfl.nu/mmaq
  Replies (0) Good night (391) Bad night (125) Order T-Shirt

Randomize