More tranny stories later!
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
