erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
