where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
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