Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
he high fived his dick after we had sex
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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